DINGbats

DING

“Hi ma’am, is there something I can do for you?”

“Yes, please take this garbage.”

You really couldn’t wait until we went through with a garbage bag? Oh well, fair enough…

“No problem”

DING

Hmm, same lady, I wonder what else she needs…

“Hello again ma’am, what can I help you with?”

“I would like a blanket”

“Sure, I’ll grab one for you.”

DING

Sigh,

“Was there something else?”

“Yes, could I get a half a glass of water so I can take my medication”

“Sure, I’ll be right back with that”

DING

You’ve got to be kidding me

“Please take this cup, its garbage”

You know that everyone gets three dings of the call button right? And once you’ve gone past that it becomes an eject button and will launch you into space?

“Sure, I’ll get that out of your way”

DING

Oh sweet Jesus, what else could she want?

“Could I get a couple of pillows for my feet please?”

Oh I’ll bring you a couple pillows but I can’t guarantee that they won’t be used to smother you first. Who needs pillows for their feet anyway? If she dings me again for some ice for her finger, which hurts from pushing the button so often I will lose it. I will run up the aisle howling like a banshee, whipping bags of pretzels at people.

"Sure can"

New Rule: Unless you are a currently having a medical emergency and require my help, or are a few minutes away from perishing from thirst you probably don't have a good reason to be pushing the call button. Things such as garbage collection and the request for foot pillows are not a good reasons.