Snakes on a Plane? Pfffft...

You may have heard of the new movie out called “Snakes on a Plane”…

Well I have complied a list of things that I’ve seen on a plane that are scarier than snakes.

-The 90lbs woman verses the 90lbs bag
-A bag full of vomit (which was placed into my hand)
-A steaming soggy diaper (which incidentally was also placed into my hand)
-Morbidly obese women climbing the stairs in the hot Florida sun
-A man walking into the lavatory with a newspaper tucked under his arm
-Babies named Meadowlark
-Dark stains on the carpet outside the lavatory
-Our “non-perishable” blueberry muffins (The expiry date is in November?!)
-In-bred, yappy, vicious Chihuahuas

How about a movie in which Samuel L Jackson gets tackled by a morbily obese woman and falls into a pile of steaming diapers and vomit bags. Meanwhile the 90lbs woman asks the newspaper man about the dark stains, who then gets mad and throws a in-bred Chuhuahua at her which lands on the lady who named her baby Meadowlark, who then chokes on her "non-perishable" blueberry muffin. Stephen King should be taking notes.